About Me

Hey there! I'm a twenty-three year old Jesus follower, and this blog is to record all of the goings-on in my life within the next months. I recently broke both of my legs, and feel God leading me to tell my story - a story of redemption and grace, of hope and pain, of excitment and fear. May you be deeply blessed as you read. Shalom!

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Sunrise.

This morning I woke up at 4:47a to see my dear friend out the door.  And by see her out the door, I mean sit up in bed while I watch her walk out.  Sleeping in the dining room has it perks... I tossed and turned for a little while, and then my dad was out the door at 5:00a.  He went to church for, what I like to call, male bonding time, otherwise known as a Men's Breakfast.  I know that it is so important for guys to have time alone with other guys, but I feel like I'm missing out!  These breakfasts always sound like so much fun!  I mean, I have to admit, I'm a little jealous!  I vote for a Women's Breakfast at 6:30a sometime.  Who's in?!  Dmode?  Heaver?  Bowman, I know you're awake.  Who are my morning girls?  "Cricket cricket..."

My point in telling you all of this is that I cannot go back to sleep.  I started to pray, (and, sadly, in the early mornings, I usually fall back asleep), but it didn't do the trick.  Then, I started Facebooking people I was thinking about.  Still awake.  Then I tried to think of sheep frolicking around on the beautiful hills of Ireland.  Now I'm wide awake.  At 6:44a Central Time.  I'm loving it. Don't tell anyone, but I'm a morning person at heart.  It's hard when night person me wants to stay up, but we'll manage.  And by we,  I mean I.  DaVinci used to sleep two hours at night, and he turned out okay.  I don't think he was schizophrenic...

The reason that I'm sharing my "Wake Up With Wollard" story is because I BibleGatewayed "sunrise" after the chain of events that just went down.  Mostly because it's just barely peeking through my window at present, and that's what I do sometimes.  I just randomly search words in the Bible, and see what verses pop up.  Not all the time, but a lot.

So now I'm blogging because I have to share what I've found.  It's different, eh?  Normally I write at, like, 11:34pm.  For the record, I'm kind of glad the blog was the last thing I thought to do.  I'm always nervous about it becoming an idol, me talking too much and not listening enough.  It's a disease that I have had before.  You get nervous when you've had a sickness & don't want it again.  I mean, diarrhea stinks, especially when it comes from the mouth.

Anyway.  Bad visual.  But you know it's true.

I've been praying this week that God would give me a new love for the Old Testament.  One of my goals in life is to understand Scripture way more than I do now.  The Old Testament and I have a great relationship, I'm in love with it, don't get me wrong, there is just so much in it that I don't understand.  And, heck, I'm 23, so I figure I have a few years to learn more.  It's what makes Christianity exciting to me; God is always on the move in my life, revealing things to me through the Bible when I ask him to.  When I listen & search.  Even in the random times!  Which is a lot.  It's why I'm so excited to be up this early reading it because finding ample time to study in the quiet is difficult.

Listening is a challenge, but it is vital.  Being deaf in one ear is hard, but I can still hear a whisper.  To hear the whisper of God means that I have to lean in close to his lips, close enough to feel his breath & the tickle of his consonants.  He's so articulate, but sometimes it's too loud around me, and we have to go into another space.  7:00a is a good space.

(And even though I just talked about listening, I'm going to keep talking now.  I just have to say one more thing.  Sorry to keep you in suspense.  Sunrise is coming.)

For those of you who have never read the Bible, or maybe only a few times in life, I'd suggest giving it a try.  It may feel scary or intimidating at first, but you would be amazed.  You can come to my house in Illinois, and we can read it together.  Fo ril.  I'll send you my address and everything.  Unless I don't know you.  Then we might have to meet at Starbucks.  Or you can wait until I'm walking again, and I'll hobble to you.  Or, you can read it on your own.  If you don't own a Bible, go to a website called BibleGateway.com & type in  "Proverbs 30:18-19" and "1 John 3:16"... If you forget to include the "1" in front of "John", that's okay.  It's a good verse too, but it's in a separate book.  Those are great places to start.


For those of you who feel like you don't read it enough, I simply say this: Be still.  You and I have a lot in common.  But be still, and know that God is God.  Make it your goal to simply listen; don't get hung up on guilt, but move closer when you're led to move closer.  Your feet do work, I promise.  You are a beautiful dancer, a fierce jouster, and a thirsty tree; drink when you need water.  Don't dehydrate.  And, yes, I know trees don't have feet, but it feels right to be compared to a thristy tree.  Trees need a lot of water.  A mature Oak Tree can drink almost 50 gallons of water a day.  That's you and I.  Dehydration can be sneaky, and I don't want you to lose limbs in the winter-time.  It's cold and windy out there.

For those of you who are faithful readers and appliers, I admire you.  Thank you for being an example and an encouragement to me.  I know it is a discipline that takes time to develop, and I'm thankful that God has given you so much grace.

To all of you on the in between places in that little spectrum I just created, sorry.  Guess you don't count.  ; )  You can come be a nomad with me!

Okay.  Just had to get that off my chest.  Finally...here it is!

Here's the verse (in a little context):

"LORD, I have heard of your fame;
   I stand in awe of your deeds, Lord.
Repeat them in our day,
   in our time make them known;
   in wrath remember mercy. 

His glory covered the heavens
   and his praise filled the earth.
His splendor was like the sunrise;
   rays flashed from his hand,
   where his power was hidden. 

The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
   he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
   he enables me to tread on the heights."


It's 8:00a now.  The sun is ablaze, orange and pink streaming down my street.  There is a beautiful street lamp right outside of my window, reminding me of Narnia.  A gigantic Weeping Willow sits across the street, her yellow hair blowing in the wind, shining in the sun.  That same side of the street has a gold glow; His powerful rays burying themselves in the freshly fallen snow.  And, even though it is very cold outside, there is a crispness, and a clarity that I can only seem to find in Winter.

I pray that you, (yes, you) find your gaze lifted high today, into the clear blue skies.  Be still today.  May you stand in awe in the deeds of your Maker, and may he enable you to tread on the heights.

Verses taken from  Habakkuk 3:2, 3.5, 4, & 19