Today is Sunday. Sunday is one of my favorite days (along with Friday, Saturday, and Wednesday) because you get to go to church to be encouraged by other people around you, serve others, learn more about the character of Jesus, and sing alongside of others. I love to sing. In case you didn't know.
Not going to church on Sunday morning is going to be a weird transition for me. Not being able to stand when invited is going to be weird for me. My mom came downstairs this morning, and I asked her what time she was going to be leaving (so I can time my potty breaks appropriately...), and she said, "You know, I thought we'd stay home this morning and have church with you." I seriously almost cried. I'm learning just how much of a people person I am. I am so relational, it's not even funny. Wanna make my day? Give me a hug, and hang out with me for a little while. I'm not that hard to win over. Hopefully, that's not pathetic. So we had church at home. I picked out a few songs on Grooveshark, and thought about what verses we could discuss. Church was supposed to start at 12, but some people weren't dressed yet & they take a long time. They were late. And the dogs in our service were being silly. We started at 12:30 instead.
My mom decided that I should pick a verse from my blog, and we would read it all together. She hasn't been reading it because (I think) it would probably be too emotional for her. (I can't imagine getting a call that your child has fallen from a wall; my dad tells his side of the story here: http://richardwollard.com/) I read 1 Peter 1:3-9 because it has been such an encouraging verse to me this week. Then she read Romans 5:3-5, which says, "Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us."
I talked about how I get stuck at the perseverance part, and even though I want the character of Christ, I don't often want to do the work or experience the things it takes to get there. Because I can be pretty stinkin' selfish. Sometimes I wonder if I'm skipping from suffering to hope. It's tempting right? Who wants to endure the suffering part? And who wants to persevere? And do you know what the character of Christ is based on? Humility. Look at Philippians 2:3-8:
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross"
Death on a cross was a big deal, then and now. He made himself nothing, and even though he was God, he didn't consider himself God's equal! I just think that's amazing; that's what we are called to. Humilty. Anyway, mom kept talking about the hope part, so I decided I was going to read the whole "Hope" entry from a couple of days ago.
It was hard to read.
There is something about reading something outloud to people that really brings an element of vulnerability and truth. It really rang true. Every single day I feel so much hope, and I can't get over it! What better thing to celebrate at church? We have so much hope in Jesus. Then we sang one of my favorite songs, "Hosanna" by Brooke Fraser (search her name on Grooveshark if you've never heard it) and ended our service.
It was a great way to focus the day, and I felt so encouraged. It's cool to be able to worship God anywhere and anytime. We worship God in so many ways too: taking a breath is an act of worship in itself. Giving God credit for it is music to his ears. I'm also so thankful to still be able to serve God by sharing what he's teaching me. He totally knows what he's doing, and I'm thankful for that too.
Afterward, we left the house for an excursion to the store. I got to wheel around the entire place - it was so much fun! I had my legs propped up with two blankets and a pillow, was covered with a bright red blanket, had my wheelchair gloves on, and a huge smile on my face. People stared at me like I was from outer-space.
This was both humbling and funny to me. It was humbling because I think that I stare at people who are in wheelchairs too (much less someone who looked as dorky as I did), but I've never received the other end of the staring. It was funny because I just started waving at people, and they started to wave back and smile. I like to make people smile.
One guy just had to ask me what I had done. So I told him. I fell off a rock climbing wall. And do you know what he said to me? "And the moral of the story iiiiis?" I just wanted to be like, "Don't talk to mean strangers in the store when you're riding in a wheelchair because you have two broken legs, you punk." Instead I just smiled and tried to laugh. I can't even tell you how tempting it is to say something like, "I ran into a burning building and saved three children. On my way out the building collapsed and I broke both of my legs", or "I work for CIA, if I tell you, I'll have to kill you." Those explanations sound so much cooler.
But I had to go and fall off of a stupid wall. It's humbling, I tell you, very, very humbling. But that's what we're called to, right? Humility. I'm glad I didn't say anything snarky to that guy, and I won't lie about what actually happened, but it's hard. I mean, what if I did work for the CIA? ; )
Catie...I just want you to know that Corey and I are thinking and praying for you and the whole family from here in Colorado. I am so glad you started this blog and truly love your thoughts as you share them.
ReplyDeleteI have been sitting here this last week wishing we still lived in IL so I could stop by and see you all as I miss you and your family so much and hate not being able to give you all hugs.
I also have been having very terrible creative block on all the 4 design projects I'm working on....so I've been going to your blog when I'm supposed to be designing to see what you have to say about your day.
Anyways, as I've been reading your words I thought...when Catie's journey is over, this blog should be published into a book for others to be moved as I absolutely love your writing and outlook on the whole adventure. Also it is awesome to get a glimpse into how you and the family are leaning on God through this which is not something people are very good at. So as I think of this book I think you should eventually get published, I of course am not having any creative block as I think of what the cover of your book would look like. :O)
I cannot imagine what you are going through yet I know that this journey of yours will have its up's and down's. I'm one of those people that absolutely cannot wait till the day you will be fully healed and will be able to look back on this and see all that God did for you and others.
I guess that's what always as kept me going through my tragedies...what am I going to be like after this?...And how much closer to God will I be after this? I almost get giddy over the fact that I know you will forever be changed..and I know it will be for the honor of God.
Again, thank you for your words and your stories. And...don't be surprised if someday I mail you a book cover design :O)
Lots of love to you. Please say hi to the family!
Julie Bohler
Thanks for sharing Catie. Prayers and blessings for you!
ReplyDeleteMark O'Meara
My dear Catie,
ReplyDeleteMy mom told me about your blog and sent me the link (haha, my mom is like my personal Facebook... first she tells me about your accident, then about your blog... oh dear). I read the whole thing just now, instead of working. Oops.
But seriously, your words are so encouraging and hopeful, and how wonderful is that coming from someone who is going through so much suffering! Your story is amazing already, and I can't wait to keep following along to see what else God has in store for you in the coming months (along with lots of healing, of course)!
I'm sad I'm living in the cornfields of Iowa and can't visit you like I want to, but you better believe I want to see you over the holidays (and your zebra casts... wait, they're zebra, right? or just black? anyway, good choice, good choice)! For now, just know that I'm praying tons (and so is Elliott!) for you and your family. You are a blessing to me, my friend! Love you!
Steph (Green... Wise... whatever. :))
I have been thinking and praying for you often. It has been great to keep up on your blog. sounds like the Lord is using it as part of the healing process.
ReplyDeleteyou mentioned grooveshark so I checked it out today. seems great. do you have to pay to be a member?